There is always a choice

It is said that the situation you find yourself in at the moment is nothing but the consequences of the choices you made at an earlier moment. In my experience this is very true. It was my choice, more than 21 years ago, to marry a Dutch man. So here I am more than 21 years later settled in The Netherlands with all its ups and downs.

Yesterday, I took out all the junk I could collect and sat out a whole day at the flea market to see if I could generate some fund for my school project in Nepal. Business was slow and the income was negligible. By the end of the day, I was worn out but very content.

Yes, I said content, now how did that happen?  Let me replay the situation of my day yesterday: It was and still is my choice to support the rebuilding of schools in Nepal. It was also my choice to sit out a day at the flea market. No one had asked or pushed me into making  these choices. So, in regard to the situation I found myself in yesterday, I had two ways to deal with it: I could either choose to feel miserable, frustrated and blame someone else for the situation or I could accept the moment  with, “better luck next time” attitude and see what I could make of the present moment. I chose for the latter and went around looking at other stalls and chatting pleasantly with the people present.

While chatting, I met this African man who told me that he was always content and happy with his life. The reason he explained, was his way of dealing with life. He said, that if he thought or told himself that he was content and happy, then his life would become content and happy, if he told himself that he was unhappy then his life would also be unhappy and miserable. Some people would call this, a self-fulfilling prophecy. Some would call it mind over matter. I define it as making a choice to either think positively or negatively regarding his life without blaming someone else for his  present situation.

There are times when I have an argument with someone or someone makes a caustic remark. I stop and look at my choices. Either ‘let go’ and still safe guard my positive energy or fall for the remark and have a big dispute and get enveloped in negative energy brought about by such disputes.

Sounds simple I know and the truth is, it is also very simple. The only effort required is to be aware of your choices for every situation (there is no wrong or right choice though) and put it into practice. For practice makes perfect.

 ‘There is always a choice’ , is a lifestyle  of mine for some years now. This conscious way of making a choice is something that I stumbled upon much later in life. Looking back to my life before this, I realise that actually the choices have always been there, only I was never aware of it. So, in the past I was always making a spontaneous choices, without being aware that I was making a choice. So I was unconsciously choosing to go left or right, to argue, to let myself get stressed etc. I was though always looking for ways to preserve my positive energy in difficult situations. After experimenting a lot with various methods to safeguard my positive energy and though trial and error, I slowly came to realised that, ‘there is always a choice’. With this lifestyle I have in the long run become  a milder person with a positive attitude towards life which in turn leaves met with sufficient positive energy to spread around as well.